Why am I different?

I realise now that I was being somewhat naive.
For you to understand someone like myself,
It must be quite difficult.
I do not question your intelligence or lessen your compassion
But your life has been so much different to mine.

It is not a physical difference nor are you any less, smarter or dexterous than I,
It is our experiences that separate us.
You have always lived in a solid four-sided structure surrounded by the like,
Facilities and conveniences, of which you take for granted,
Are not always at hand for such as I.
For you see I live aboard a ship,
A sailing ship.

For you at home adverse weather is an inconvenience to day-to-day life.
With the intense cold or warm front sweeping over your neighbourhood,
You know the weather is going to be miserable.
So you spend the least time outside,
And maximum times inside warm dry secure.

But when you see the weather map with foul weather ashore.
Look out to the areas as sea where there is no civilisation.
Know that this very well is where I could be.
Not by choice or maybe it is I am now no longer sure.
Working with all my skill and strength to bring my ship,
And the lives aboard through these conditions, which are,
Potentially fraught with danger and laced with intense beauty.

To you ashore this may sound melodramatic,
But to someone such as myself it is all too real.

How could you possibly know what it is like to be in a force ten storm?
Aboard a vessel which will only survive with the combined skill
And brute force of a united and determined crew.
To lay aloft and take in sail in freezing conditions with ice all about
Wearing clumsy boots and heavy bulky clothing
Sleet or snow or both running down the back of your neck
With hands that are bare so you may grip
But are so weak and numb with cold

How could you possibly know what it is like to stand at the wheel,
The fierce rain slanting at right angles into your eyes.
You dare not look away for fear of falling off course and into danger
Sparing a hand for a moment to give a quick wipe of the eyes
The mind for a brief moment notes
How cold and miserable a tropical storm can be.

How could you possibly know what it is like to be in such conditions?
When your muscles are so weary and sore
The mind numb from lack of sleep and stressed from the impossible
Where you dare not pause or rest
For fear of irreparably damaging the ship or worse Ö. Your mates.

Where I am I see the stars from one horizon to the next
Picking out individual constellations, each has an ancient legend
Watching the falling stars, there are so many every night
The speeding satellites that race across the sky
The moon, so few people ever see the moon as it is
Most see it as they see street lamps or billboards
Never truly seeing the wonder of it

Then the sun rises in the eastern sky
To start the whole day afresh
The colours make you sit back in awe of the beauty
As the bright burning disc of the sun rises into a new day

By the end of the morning watch
Work begins as it does every day at sea
With toil and sweat we maintain the vessel
And as the vessel never stops nor does the work
Working from sunrise to sunset
To keep ahead of the maintenance list

But as the sun dips below the western horizon
We at sea can have the satisfaction
Of observing the fruits of our labour
The tall sails billowing out as they push our mighty vessel
To far off lands, kept aloft by our knowledge and skill
How can we not feel the pride.

People. The diversity of them all across this wide world of ours
Their colours, languages, religions, and customs.
As I sail across the seas to they're many nations
I feel privileged to be able to experience, respect and love
Their richness and wonder

The majority of the people in this world are fantastic
Still the ugly few are always there
To them it is I who is the ethnic foreigner
The gringo, gajun, the white man, and all the foul expressions
That people use for someone who is simply different
Even in the country, which I nominally call home I see the bigotry and the xenophobia.

The next time someone stops you in the middle of the street
Asks you with faulty broken words for assistance
Do not dismiss them for their poor speech or strange dress
Stop and give them a hand
So many kind citizens of this world
Have done the same and more for me

For myself I am blessed to be enchanted with the sea
Though to maintain sanity in this challenging environment
I have to make this not my work
But my lifestyle
For every moment that I am awake
I must focus on the needs of the vessel and the people aboard
Even asleep I may be called at any time

This is the true challenge the sea sets before me
A challenge I gladly accept for its complexity
I who venture out from the safety of the shores
Learn to adapt to the ever-changing circumstances
Though sailors are creatures of routine and habit
It is to provide order in the environment
Where no two days are the same

I feel committed to giving back what I have learnt and experienced
To teach others the personal discipline
Required to live and survive through the rigors
Of this harsh and unusual environment
And trust that lessons learnt by them,
Will serve in good stead for the future.

When it all seems so hard and I am weary of it all
I look up into the rig and see the sails stretched out to the wind
The towering mass of canvas with the intricate web of rigging
I gain a tremendous feeling of satisfaction
Knowing that my skill and strength
Has helped to enable this vessel to sail to all corners of the globe
Using just the power of the wind.

So please forgive me if I appear disgruntled or upset
Your attitude towards me is perfectly understandable
For how could you know the person I have become?
You were not by my side at the time
To see or experience the same moments with me
And so becoming this different person
Who stands before you?

Though we are two people from different walks of life
Perhaps we can now talk and share our experiences
Becoming friends who accept each other for what we are
Acknowledging our differences
Knowing that, that is what makes us
The unique and interesting people we are
I ask this of you as an act of friendship.

Glenn R. Williams